Mornings are when the universe decides I'd like to relive every awkward memory from childhood. This particular Tuesday, it was the time I managed to simultaneously spill oatmeal, trip on my own feet, and knock over a water bottle in exactly two seconds – a feat of coordinated clumsiness I'm convinced only occurs on Wednesdays and Thursdays. The whole incident transpired in the space of a single elevator ride, leaving me wondering, not for the first time, why we even used these ancient, torture chambers of transportation.
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