In a burst of unrequited enthusiasm, I spent the entire Saturday trying to train my stuffed rabbit, Fuzzy, to fetch. I fashioned a makeshift obstacle course using couch cushions, coffee tables, and strategically placed socks. Fuzzy obediently followed the path, pausing for the necessary sock-pauses, and occasionally snagging a sock for extra credit. As the competition's judges – my sister (12), my mom, and a bemused dust bunny – looked on, I solemnly informed Fuzzy that if he performed well enough, he might even get promoted to Real Dog.
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